can i be on your team? ask him he's the captain! playgroundbanterLAD
Was talking to a female friend the other day (6/10) when she informed me that she would be very interested in sleeping with one of my pals. She begged me not to tell him as it would be "too embarrassing". However, i thought it would be best to speed the process along. As soon as i got home i informed my mate of her desires. Needless to say the deed was done two nights later. HelpingHandLAD
To the LAD a who arrived one hour late for a two hour exam at Uni a few weeks ago, noisily banged open the door so everyone turned around, then held up a McDonald's bag and announced, "I've just picked up a Chicken Mayo for 99p!". Fair play mate, we were all in stitches. But DefinitelyNotWorthItLAD
Went for a few quite ones last night cause I had work in the morning, ended up in Newcastle on a mad one (from Carlisle) had no sleep and had to go straight to work from the train station and pretend that my uniform got damaged in the wash. JustHavingAQuickOneInThePubLAD
Every LAD remembers the worst fart they have ever let rip. Lets be honest in that moment you are filled with extreme pride and usually uncontrollable laughter. My worst one was on a train when I was 8. Two African woman were sitting next to me. I let off a stinker. Their faces resembled the face you pull if you have just eaten a lemon and one pulled her head scarf off to put it over her nose. The other opened the window the mere 1cm it would open in an attempt to get some fresh air circulating in the train coach and to save her nasal hair being singed. All the while I tried to hold in my laughter and my mum gave me the sternest look. As a punishment I wasn't allowed any ice cream that night.. I'd like to know-what was your worst fart? WhatDidIEatLAD
My mate talking about his ex moving on last night after he had a few drinks "ya know mate it's like i know i was never interested in her at all but it's just like when you have leftover food in the fridge , you don't want to eat it but you may do at some point , and when someone does eat it you're like hey...that's my fucking food bitch" interestingpointLAD
I once got dumped by a girl (7/10) because she'd seen some fortune teller who told her to. MentalbitchLAD
I had a mate who worked in Canada as a ski instructor. Now because it's Canada and because it's a ski slope there's a lot of weed smoking going on and it can often be smelled from the chairlift. My mate coached kids around 6 years old and they often asked "what is that smell?". Rather than explain to these innocent minds that drugs were being smoked he just said that he didn't know what the smell was and he would ask the kids what they thought the smell was. One time the kids answered "it smells like fires!" another said "it smells like BBQs!" and one kid once said "it smells like my uncle steve!" UnclesteveLAD
Today is the day I feel I've finally become a true man. Its been 13 fun but exhausting years, but I have finally managed to stop moving to the S club beat. Ain'tnopartylikeanSclubpartyLAD
I have this 2/10 girl pretty much begging to get with me. I've come up with. Umpteen excuses including this weekends "I just wanna try different stuff. Like threesomes.. but to my horror she agrees.. what do to??
Doesn't matter what sort of video I start out watching on pornhub, 90% of the time I will end up finishing up with a MILF video. ForegoneconclusionLAD
Just watched the women's version of The Queen's Tennis tournament, and there's a 16 year-old Croatian in the final. She's legal, and a 7/10 already. OneforthefutureLADS
While getting a landslide goodLAD on your banter is great, there is something about dividing the opinion of the LADs and getting fairly equal good and shit LADs. FirmButFairLAD.
How do gayLADs do it? I wiped too hard after a shit yesterday and my arsehole is still on fire. couldnottakeabummingLAD
Iron Maiden requested a Spitfire do a fly past at Download festival in tribute to those in the RAF serving abroad.ultimatemetalDONLADS
quote from my dad LAD. 'it was a bit like that song lost in France, except we we're abbeydale and id had 13 pints of tetley's. tetleyslovingdadLAD
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