Lad Roulette

The original chorus of Paradise City by Guns n Roses as suggested by Slash was 'take me down to paradise city/ where the girls are cheap and they've got big titties' SlashLAD

TrueLAD has set up a World Cup Fantasy League. Go to http://en.mcdonalds.fantasy.fifa.com/ and sign up. The league code is 288188-68262. You can pick your team from 4th June when the final squads are released. FUCKING LOVE THE WORLD CUP!!!! LAD

Just moved to uni. First night here and I'm making pork crackling (chefLAD) and I drain the fat. I jokingly say to a chick housemate "would you drink this?" and a LAD pipes up with "I would for a fiver". He'll drink almost anything for money, and since his loan hasn't come through he should be using the money to buy food, but he's such a LAD he's spending it on booze and fags for us. LAD

Was in a club with a bunch of LADS, when a fire started and a loud sound came on saying EVACUATE, EVACUATE when my mate got up started dancing and drinking everyone elses drinks. He thought it was a song. LAD.

Out last night, needed a piss between pubs so I went around the corner. 4 coppers pulled up beside me and asked what I was up to. Smelling my piss, they said that I either had to pay a fine of £80 or say sorry to the wall. Decided to apologise so he said repeat after me "Sorry Mr Wall for pissing on you, and I promise never to piss on you again" when repeating I added mate at the end, to which the copper replied " Don't call him mate, you've just pissed on him" PoliceBanterLAD

my grandLAD passed away a few years ago now but one of the strongest memories i have of him is being on a family holiday in turkey and watching this belly dancer with him. after she'd finished my grandLAD got her over, gave me some money and said here mate give her that. i went to just put it in her hand but he stopped me and said no in there grabbed my hand and made me put the money in her bra whilst having a cheeky feel. i must have been about 11! trainemupearlyLAD

Havin sex wit me girlfriend nd jus as wer cumin she screams LAAAAAAAAADDDDDD! Sexiest thing ever. LAD

Driving through Edinburgh on the way back from skiing, saw an old couple at the end of their drive way... Old man stood leaning on a metal pole looking on at his wife struggling with a gigantic snow shovel clearing the driveway... OldLAD

Met a girl at a gig and got quite intimate quickly,afterwards we exchanged names so we could find each other again. I gave her a fake name and walked away happily (sneakyLAD). I went to find her on facebook to show my friends and realised she gave me a fake name too. DecievedAndDecievingLAD

Went to a house party as a teenager, pulled a 6 - 7 out of 10. Went to the mum's room pulled the cabinet in front of the door so we would not be interrupted. Gave her the best three minutes of her life, unfortunately the mum came home early, and RUDELY barged the door open. The grandmother's ashes were on the cabinet and smashed all over the floor, which we had to walk through to get out of the room whilst dodging a screaming distraught mother trying to scratch my eyes out. LAD

Keeley Hazell has a sex tape that you can find pretty easily through google. YoureWelcomeLADs

While cleaning my room with my mum i open a dvd case to find four empty condom rappers. HidethemwhereveryoucanLAD

to another radio 1 LAD who texted in with the name Mike Oxlong. Poor Scott Mills didn't have a clue! makingradio1presenterssayrudethingsonairLAD

at rugby match and just after two middle aged streakers had been taken off the pitch and arrested (LADs)me and a few other LADs nicked my best mates shoe, lobbed it ont the pitch and over the posts for 3 points, mate goes to fetch it stewads came and after a massive conversation comes back with a cheeky grin on his face saying he would have been arrested if the police were still here from taking the away streakers, had his details taken but not even annoyed at us FORTHEBANTERLAD

Was on the way back from work, about half 11 at night...driving back its pissing down with rain and this girl (6/10) walking on the pavement sticks her arm out, i give her a lift back to her place, shes 33 im 18 but i pretend im 27 (our little secret LAD) she invites me into her house and we get down to business, shes rough as fuck, whips me with my belt and leaves teeth marks in my manhood. Half way through sex i notice kids toys everywhere, i carry on. After blowing my load inside her, no condom too...i ask her wats the toys about..she replies �o yeh, my husband and son are asleep upstairs� ....grabbed my stuff and ran down the road to my car naked... ruiningmarriagesLAD